I'm Rochelle and I have Gum Disease

Today I'm pouring tea Periodontal Disease.  This tea smells bad, tastes bad, hurts your gums and teeth and can lead to other health problems as well.

THREE out of FOUR Americans struggle with gum disease and NEVER go to the Dentist to improve their dental health.  Gum disease can range from mild cases of gingivitis, to the more severe form known as periodontists.  If you don't go to the dentist and check on the health of your teeth and gums, it can prove detrimental to your over-all health!  Gum disease has been linked to diabetes, heart disease and certain forms of cancer!

I hate the dentist like credit card bills, racists and child pornographers.  Because of my fear and years of neglect, I have periodontal disease.  It's not fun to go to the dentist and find out you have "pockets" in your gums where plaque and bacteria have built up because you didn't floss properly (or at all) and keep up with your visits.  The treatment to remove build-up and treat the inflammation of my gums, is not only painful, but, expensive as well.  Not to mention that I have some bone loss and some of my teeth have shifted and I have gaps that will cost me more money to repair.

Pay attention to your teeth and gums!

Bleeding gums - Not normal.  Make an appointment right away.  Your gums should not bleed from normal brushing or eating an apple.

Bad Breath or Halitosis - Your breath shouldn't be bad.  If it is, it could be because of bacteria and plaque build up.  You need to go to the dentist and check that out.

To lessen your chances of getting periodontal disease  you need to:

1.  Brush your teeth after every meal.

2.  Floss DAILY.

3.  Go to the Dentist regularly.

Now, there are also other factors that contribute to periodontal disease.  Stress, heredity and poor diet are all contributing factors as well.

So, make an appointment to see your dentist today.  Time for a GRILL CHECK Biotch!

Me at the dentist with the attitude face.

Wild Card Wednesday - Oh You're Too Good?

Today's Topic:  Sorority Snobs

Okay.  Let me preface this by saying I have nothing against sororities!  I think they're great!  Great for our culture, great for our communities and great for sisterhood.  I'm actually a member of a Business and Professional Sorority (let me be real...I'm NOT financial).  I would even like to join a D9 (Divine Nine) sorority at some point.

BUT...here's the thing...

There are some ladies that make it appear as though being in their sorority somehow makes them a demigod.  Yes, your organization is great.  Yes, you all do great things BUT...that's not all there is to you!  Don't you enjoy television, movies, books, clothes, cooking, sight seeing, traveling, church...SOMETHING!  I don't want to have a conversation with you if your sorority is going to end up in 98% of our conversations!

What bothers me the most is the attitude that some ladies have.  Don't give me the librarian looking down her nose through her glasses stare because I'm not in your org!  This is not sophomore year and we are not on the yard waiting on a probate show to start! 

Where is all this coming from?  Well, today, I was in the elevator with a lady that asked me if I was a Delta.  I politely said no.  She told me that I looked like one of her sorors from yester-year (I'm paraphrasing). And again, I politely smiled.  She said oh, I know!  You're a Zeta huh?  I knew I recognized you from the this or that thing (again I'm paraphrasing).  I sucked my teeth and replied "wrong again".  She said well, I KNOW you're not an AKA!  You're not that type and SGRhos don't really exist! Bitch really?  Did you just effectively stereotype me while dissing another organization all before breakfast?  Get your damn crimson and cream life!  Luckily, my floor came up and I exited without a word. 

She was a classic example of doing too much on the sorority tip!  This lady was doing the MOST! 

All I'm saying is be in your sorority but, don't take it so seriously!  The outside world isn't as impressed with it as you are.  Love your org without beating folks over the head with it!

Damn!

Tea Garden - I met Dr. Martin L. King at Church

This post is obviously not about modern day celebrities that grace the cover of popular magazines.  It's not about fashion forward glamazons or musical artists and their antics.  Today I'm pouring tea on the first time I came to realize who Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. was. 

My mother always sent me to my granny in the Summer.  As a young girl I looked forward to the drive to Brighton a small suburb of Birmingham, AL.  I would watch the skies for signs of animal shaped clouds and birds flying in flocks to some Utopian destination I had created in my mind.  I would day dream listening the R&B music that filled the air in our car as we sped down I-20 towards my granny's big welcoming arms.  That journey always soothed me, made me feel like I was on my way to forever. 

 

Vacation Bible School and Sunday School were not optional during my sweet Summer sabbaticals.  I didn't mind at all.  I loved catching up with my Alabama peers and bragging to them about how living in Atlanta was nothing like the slow paced way of life in little old Brighton.  During one visit to Sunday school, I happened to notice a photo of MLK hanging next to a photo of Jesus.  He had on a blue suit, a white shirt and a black tie.  His right arm was raised and his mouth was open.  Beneath his torso "I Have A Dream" was written in block letters.  I clearly read "I Have" but, had to sound out "D-R-E-A-M".  I had to ask who was that?  Why was he next to Jesus?  Was he in the Bible?  Did he have a dream about Jesus?

My granny explained to me that Black people weren't always viewed as equals in our country.  She said that Martin Luther King helped people to understand that we are all the same and should be able to enjoy the same things in life.  We should be able to share schools, bathrooms, offices, buses and anything else we wanted.  She said skin color isn't important but, what we do and what we stand for...is.  She made it so easy to understand.  She reminded me of the waiting rooms in her doctor's office.  It was the late eighties and we would still sit on the "Colored" side in that waiting room.  His name was Dr. Brooks.  Damn Dr. Brooks and his racist, conformist ass for that.  I never asked her why we sat there.  I wish I had.

Years later, that conversation was the foundation for what would be many coloring sheet forays, politically correct lectures in class, "I Have a Dream" writing exercises, Black History Month programs and countless discussions with my mama about a myriad of topics Civil rights related.  To this day, I think of that poster taped to the wood paneled wall in Sunday school.  Beckoning to me, to understand that the dream was something that was for me and every other person in that room.  The dream was radical and revolutionary but, it was righteous. 

I met MLK at church.  The same place that I met Jesus, Moses and the first Preacher I'd ever known.  It was poignant and powerful.  That church family revered Jesus and MLK so much that they placed them side by side.  Deities in their own right.

Now that I'm an adult, and no longer a Christian, I truly understand why that poster was next to Jesus. Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. was a God like figure - a savior that sacrificed his safety, personal peace and his earthly body for the idea that all people deserved to be free from all injustice.   Jesus, (whom many believe) was a savior, a champion of morality, justice and equality was an almighty God that sacrificed his earthly body to salvage the corrupt and wretched souls of man.  How could they not share the same space on that wall?

Common Courtesy - Keep the Door Open

Topic for January 18, 2013: Keep The Door Open

The Logic:  When you're entering a business, a home, an airport, a hospital or any other place with door, it's Common Courtesy to hold the door open for the person behind you.  It only takes a fraction of a second to hold the door open and it is almost always appreciated by the recipient.  Think of it as an extension to the "Good Manners Talk" you received in Kindergarten and First Grade.  Say please and thank you, cover your mouth when you sneeze, say excuse me when applicable, say Bless You when someone else sneezes, etc.  Included in the fine print of that talk was "Open the door for the those coming behind you".  Theoretically, you could take this metaphorically and apply it to other areas in life but, for now, we'll stick with the literal.

The Rant: Who are you assholes that walk through doors KNOWING that someone is behind you and just let the door swing, slam or glide in their faces?  What are you doing that is so pressing that you can't stop for a brief moment to hold the door open for a fellow human?!  Oh, and don't get me started on the ladies that think doors are supposed to be opened for them but, they can't return the favor! #GetChoRudeAssLife

The Real:  You never know who you are helping when you take a quick moment to open a door and smile.  It only takes a moment of your time and it saves someone else a little trouble.  You could potentially meet your future spouse, your new employee or a dear friend.  Kindness and courtesy go a long way.  It's free to be courteous and considerate.  Live your life always knowing that what you put out into the universe comes back, whatever you sow so shall you reap and what goes around, comes around.  So, open the door out of kindness and open the door to a little piece of happy in your future.

Wild Card Wednesday - As Long as He's Got a Penis...

Wild Card Wednesday is my time for an "anything goes" type of post.  I may create a post about marriage, motherhood, fashion, health or anything else.  This week's post is dedicated to a bit of wisdom my mother shared with me.

I make it a point to not involve either set of in-laws in our marital affairs.  However, at times, I'll ask my mom for advice on different things about marriage.  Recently, I've been under the weather and I've been feeling less of a super mom and wife.  I actually took my cape off and I expected my husband to pick it up and do things as I would do them.  Of course that didn't happen.  I realize that was an unrealistic expectation.  When I told my mom that, she broke it all the way down!

She said:

As long as he has a penis, you're going to have to communicate what you need.  Don't ever expect him to automatically know what you want him to do.  Even if it's clearly apparent, don't expect that it's clearly apparent to him.  

She's right.  Even though I would like for him to just KNOW when to step in and help...that's not reality.  So, I gave that up and now I'm feeling better.  If there are dishes in the sink, dirty clothes in the hamper or they eat frozen food for a few days...the world is not going to end.

But...as long as he has a penis though?  I love my mama!

Common Courtesy - Respect Your Elders

Topic for January 11, 2013:  ADULTS - Respect your Elders

 The Logic:  In many countries around the world, the elders of  society are revered, admired and respected for their age, knowledge and wisdom.  To have the honor and the privilege to speak with an elder is indeed a thing to be treasured and appreciated.  They have laid the foundation for so many of the pleasures we take for granted today.  

Therefore, when you encounter an elder (in my opinion anyone remotely old enough to be your parent) you should treat them with the utmost respect.  Listen to them when they speak.  Offer to be of service to them should they need it.  Temper your tongue and monitor your actions when around them.  Most importantly, show them that they are still relevant and important to you.

The Rant:  How dare some of you walk around this Earth with your ass and your ignorance hanging out wondering why people from previous generations don't understand you?  You can't stop and say hello, open the door for an older person, refrain from using offensive language in their presence or treat them like they've earned your respect just off the strength of their age!  You don't have to like or agree with what your elders say.  However, you should want to demonstrate your appreciation for their life journey by being humble and respectful in their presence.  Some of you make me sick resting upon the laurels of those that came before you and you can't even show them the proper respect.  If anyone has told you that just because you're an adult that you don't have to respect your elders, then you'd better stick a penis in your ear and f*ck what you heard because that's totally incorrect.  You disrespectful, ignorant heathen!

 

  

The Real: The real is that you wouldn't be a tenth of what you are were it not for the elders in society that fought for your civil rights, invented modern conveniences or even patented the products that simplify your life.  Though you may not realize it, your life's journey could be made easier by acquiring the information an elder has.  Don't be foolish and think that you are the only one worthy of respect.  Oh, and don't hand me that "respect is earned" crap!  If that's the case, then your ass is severely lacking in seniority and you need to have several seats and a nap.

Tea Garden

Welcome Lovely Blossoms!  Every Monday I plan to pour some hot and steamy tea for you to start your day!  Just in case you are unaware, "tea" is slang for gossip.  This feature is not just reserved for the  uber famous celebrities.  I'll serve tea, juices and berries on psuedo celebrities and faux celebrity bloggers alike (yes, I tried it).

Alright let's just jump right into it...

A glob of honey goes to Kenya Moore of Real Housewives of Atlanta and her amazing self esteem. On last night's episode, she stated that she has been told she favors Beyonce.  Let's just be all the way real.  No one told her that.  If they did, they lied.  It's obvious to me that she just needs some good therapy, a few hugs and a box of tissue.  Furthermore, this thing with Walter is just a vapid dream wrapped up in a needy quilt, sandwiched between some insecurity and fear.  I want her to stop.  Like yesterday.  Her natural hair is fabbers though.

An entire packet of Splenda goes to Amber Rose and Whiz Khalifa.  They celebrated the impending birth of their bouncing baby boy at their baby shower yesterday.  Are you not LOVING that rainbow colored bodycon dress on Amber?  Oh, you're not?  Booo to you my friend...boo to you. By the by...that's Lola Monroe with her.  She's a cutesville preggers chick too.

Two lumps of raw sugar to Tami Roman star of Basketball Wives and her new NV Clinical Diet Adds.  Moses KNOWS that I have been contemplating a pill, powder or potion to aid me in shedding these extra pounds.  She looks good in the adds.  Classy and articulate.  That's a big come-up from her portrayal on Basketball Wives and The Real World...remember her on that?

Every week, I will give a specially brewed tea to a person I think that is most deserving.  

The blend this week is...

Especially for Kerry Washington in her Peter Pilotto dress.  Baby, this dress is so fly and so outside of the box!  This is definitely a Resurrection Sunday dress!  This look has the power to raise the dead! Did you see the leopard print pumps. #PraiseMoses

Common Courtesy

Hello Lovely Blossoms!  I'm excited to have you here for my first official post of the New Year!  I want to make a concerted effort to make sure I keep you all coming here. Therefore, I am going to introduce my new weekly features.

Every Friday I would like to cover a manners or etiquette-esque topic.  I think a large part of what is so artificial about people these days is the lack of manners.  I mean, it's a light-weight epidemic.  So, without further delay...


Introducing...Common Courtesy - Weekly feature during which I discuss things that are polite and should be included in your courtesy arsenal.

Topic for January 4, 2012:  Saying "Hello" or as we in the South like to call it..."speaking"

The Logic: In America it is Common Courtesy to greet someone with a Hi, Hello, How do you do or Hey!  This is not an arbitrary exercise reserved for the elite of our society.  This practice is beneficial for all!  Greeting someone when you see them not only opens the door of communication, it gives people the impression that you're well mannered.

Don't be devoid of emotion when you give your greeting.  Give your greeting with genuine sincerity.   You don't know how much power your words have over your life and the lives those around you.  Furthermore, understand that a greeting is required of you upon entering into any edifice, domicile or general area where there are people that you haven't seen or spoken to during the course of the day.

The Rant:I don't know why some of you are so stoic!  Why do you walk around the world with a permanent scowl on your face?  You look like you're constantly smelling something spoiled!  If your life is so broken, so beyond repair that you can't utter even a simple and kind hello, then please remand yourself to the confines of your home.  No one wants to see your ugly mug walking around!  There is no harm in smiling and saying hello!  No one expects you to pour sugar on top of shit and call it cake but, damn!  Even if you're not "feelin' it", you can still fake it 'till you make it.  Sometimes, forcing yourself to smile and interact with the world lightens your melancholy mood.

This rings ESPECIALLY true for minority women (Of course I am not making a grand and sweeping generalization.  Don't surmise I'm saying it's all of us Black women.  I'm not speaking directly to you.  However, a hit dog will holler won't he?).  We already have to fight the ABWS (Angry Black Woman Syndrome) and the feisty Latina stereotypes.  Let's not feed into them by, not understanding how to be generally pleasant!

The Real:  No one likes to be around people that aren't (or at least seem to be) friendly.  You'll go a lot further in your career, in your relationships and in your life if you learn how to properly greet people.  Yes, sometimes it may seem a great and trying burden - but, kindly get over it...and be courteous.